forked from EllieBotDevs/elliebot
170 lines
No EOL
13 KiB
Text
170 lines
No EOL
13 KiB
Text
Yo mama is so fat that her bellybutton gets home 15 minutes before she does.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh-eating disease, the doctor gave her ten years to live.
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Yo mama is so fat that the National Weather Service names each one of her farts.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she wears a yellow raincoat, people yell "taxi!"
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Yo mama is so fat and dumb that the only reason she opened her email was because she heard it contained spam.
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Yo mama is so fat she threw on a sheet for Halloween and went as Antarctica.
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Yo mama is so fat that she looked up cheat codes for Wii Fit
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Yo mama is so fat that the only exercise she gets is when she chases the ice cream truck.
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Yo mama is so fat that she sat on a dollar and squeezed a booger out George Washington's nose.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she gets in an elevator, it has to go down.
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Yo mama is so fat that when her beeper goes off, people think she's backing up.
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Yo mama is so fat that she has to iron her pants on the driveway.
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Yo mama is so fat that she left the house in high heels and came back wearing flip flops.
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Yo mama is so fat that people jog around her for exercise.
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Yo mama is so fat that she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her for the New World.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she walked in front of the TV, I missed 3 seasons of Breaking Bad.
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Yo mama is so fat that you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through!
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Yo mama is so fat that that when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace shows up and tries to tow her back into the ocean...
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Yo mama is so fat that when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she talks to herself, it's a long distance call.
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Yo mama is so fat that the last time she saw 90210, it was on a scale.
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Yo mama is so fat that light bends around her.
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Yo mama is so fat that I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing!
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Yo mama is so fat that when she sat on Wal-Mart, she lowered the prices.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she sat on an iphone, it turned into an ipad.
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Yo mama is so fat that even god can't lift her spirit.
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Yo mama is so fat that she gets group insurance.
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Yo mama is so fat that she was zoned for commercial development.
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Yo mama is so fat that she walked into the Gap and filled it.
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Yo mama is so fat that she comes at you from all directions.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she climbed onto a diving board at the beach, the lifeguard told your dad "sorry, you can't park here".
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Yo mama is so fat that her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard.
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Yo mama is so fat that she looks like shegs smuggling a Volkswagen.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she got her shoes shined, she had to take the guygs word for it.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she sings, itgs over for everybody.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she ran away, they had to use all four sides of the milk carton to display her picture.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she was growing up she didngt play with dolls, she played with midgets.
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Yo mama is so fat that she uses two buses for roller-blades.
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Yo mama's so fat she blew up the Deathstar.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she goes to a buffet, she gets the group rate.
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Yo mama is so fat that she has to put her belt on with a boomerang.
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Yo mama is so fat that she broke the Stairway to Heaven.
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Yo mama is so fat that she doesngt eat with a fork, she eats with a forklift.
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Yo mama is so fat that the last time the landlord saw her, he doubled the rent.
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Yo mama is so fat that Weight Watchers wongt look at her.
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Yo mama is so fat that the highway patrol made her wear a sign saying "Caution! Wide Turn".
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Yo mama is so fat that when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!
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Yo mama is so fat that when she steps on a scale, it reads "one at a time, please".
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Yo mama is so fat that she fell in love and broke it.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she gets on the scale it says "We don't do livestock".
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Yo mama is so fat that when she tripped on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th.
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Yo mama is so fat that God couldn't light the Earth until she moved!
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Yo mama is so fat that even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!
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Yo mama is so fat that she has to pull down her pants to get into her pockets.
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Yo mama is so fat that she was born on the fourth, fifth, and sixth of June.
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Yo mama is so fat that she could fall down and wouldngt even know it.
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Yo mama is so fat that the sign inside one restaurant says, “Maximum occupancy: 300, or Yo momma.”
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Yo mama is so fat that she puts mayonnaise on aspirin.
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Yo mama is so fat that she was born with a silver shovel in her mouth.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips.
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Yo mama is so fat that she had to go to Sea World to get baptized.
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Yo mama is so fat that her bellybuttons got an echo.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she turns around people throw her a welcome back party.
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Yo mama is so fat that her belly button doesngt have lint, it has sweaters.
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Yo mama is so fat that a picture of her would fall off the wall.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she takes a shower, her feet dongt get wet.
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Yo mama is so fat that she puts on her lipstick with a paint-roller!
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Yo mama is so fat that she could sell shade.
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Yo mama is so fat that I ran around her twice and got lost.
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Yo mama is so fat that the shadow of her butt weighs 100 pounds.
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Yo mama is so fat that when shegs standing on the corner police drive by and yell, “Hey, break it up.”
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Yo mama is so fat that her blood type is Ragu.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she runs the fifty-yard dash she needs an overnight bag.
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Yo mama is so fat that she cangt even fit into an AOL chat room.
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Yo mama is so fat when she goes skydiving she doesn't use a parachute to land, she uses a twin-engine plane!
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Yo mama is so fat MTX audio's subwoofers couldn't rattle her bones!
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Yo mama is so fat her headphones are a pair of PA speakers connected to a car amplifier.
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Yo mama is so fat that she doesngt have a tailor, she has a contractor.
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Yo mama is so fat that eating contests have banned her because she is unfair competition.
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Yo mama is so fat that she measures 36-24-36, and the other arm is just as big.
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Yo mama is so fat that she gets her toenails painted at Luckygs Auto Body.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!
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Yo mama is so fat that when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!
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Yo mama is so fat that she has more Chins than a Chinese phone book!
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Yo mama is so fat that she influences the tides.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she plays hopscotch, she goes "New York, L.A., Chicago..."
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Yo mama is so fat that NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!
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Yo mama is so fat that when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
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Yo mama is so fat that they have to grease the bath tub to get her out!
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Yo mama is so fat that she's on both sides of the family!
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Yo mama is so fat that at the zoo, the elephants throw HER peanuts.
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Yo mama is so fat you have to roll over twice to get off her.
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Yo mama is so fat that she sets off car alarms when she runs.
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Yo mama is so fat that she cant reach into her back pocket.
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Yo mama is so fat that she has her own gravity field.
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Yo mama is so fat that she stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles.
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Yo mama is so fat that the only pictures you have of her were taken by satellite cameras.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she wears a "Malcolm X" T-shirt, helicopters try to land on her back!
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Yo mama is so fat that it took Usain Bolt 3 years to run around her.
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Yo mama so fat that she sweats more than a dog in a chinese restaurant.
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Yo mama so fat, that went she stepped in the water, Thailand had to declare another tsunami warning.
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Yo mama is so fat that that she cant tie her own shoes.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she lays on the beach, people run around yelling Free Willy.
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Yo mama is so fat that she uses redwoods to pick her teeth
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Yo mama is so fat that she cut her leg and gravy poured out
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Yo mama is so fat that she was in the Macygs Thanksgiving Day Parade... wearing ropes.
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Yo mama is so fat that she went on a light diet. As soon as itgs light she starts eating.
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Yo mama is so fat that shegs half Italian, half Irish, and half American.
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Yo mama is so fat that her waist size is the Equator.
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Yo mama is so fat that she cangt even jump to a conclusion.
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Yo mama is so fat that she uses a mattress for a tampon.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock at me?"
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Yo mama is so fat that we went to the drive-in and didn't have to pay for her because we dressed her up as a Toyota.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.
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Yo mama is so fat that she was cut from the cast of E.T., because she caused an eclipse when she rode the bike across the moon.
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Yo mama is so fat that when you get on top of her your ears pop.
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Yo mama is so fat that she got hit by a car and had to go to the hospital to have it removed.
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Yo mama is so fat that she eats "Wheat Thicks".
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Yo mama is so fat that we're in her right now!
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Yo mama is so fat that she went to the movie theatre and sat next to everyone.
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Yo mama is so fat that she has been declared a natural habitat for condors.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she wants to shake someones hand, she has to give directions!
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Yo mama is so fat that even Dora can't explore her!
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Yo mama is so fat that when she gets on the scale it says "to be continued".
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Yo mama is so fat that when she goes to a resturant, she looks at the menu and says "okay!"
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Yo mama is so fat that even Chuck Norris couldn't run around her.
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Yo mama is so fat that her neck looks like a dozen hot dogs!
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Yo mama is so fat that when she bungee jumps she goes straight to hell!
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Yo mama is so fat that she's got her own area code!
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Yo mama is so fat that she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!
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Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy three airline tickets.
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Yo mama is so fat that whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!
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Yo mama is so fat that she's got Amtrak written on her leg.
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Yo mama is so fat that her legs are like spoiled milk - white & chunky!
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Yo mama is so fat that I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the her good side!
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Yo mama is so fat that she wakes up in sections!
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Yo mama so fat, all she wants for Christmas is to see her feet.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she lies on the beach no one else gets any sun!
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Yo mama is so fat that that her senior pictures had to be taken from a helicopter!
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Yo mama is so fat that everytime she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!
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Yo mama is so fat that she fell and created the Grand Canyon!
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Yo mama is so fat that her butt drags on the ground and kids yell - "there goes santa claus with his bag of toys!"
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Yo mama is so fat that even her clothes have stretch marks!
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Yo mama is so fat that she has to use a VCR as a beeper!
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Yo mama is so fat that when she asked for a waterbed, they put a blanket over the ocean!
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Yo mama is so fat that she got hit by a parked car!
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Yo mama is so fat that they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping.
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Yo mama is so fat that when we were playing Call of Duty, I got a 20 kill streak for killing her.
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Yo mama is so fat that Dracula got Type 2 Diabetes after biting her neck.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she visited Toronto's City Hall, she was arrested for attempting to smuggle 500 lbs of crack into Mayor Rob Ford's office.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she fell over she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again.
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Yo mama is so fat that that when I tried to drive around her I ran out of gas.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she went to church and sat on a bible, Jesus came out and said "LET MY PEOPLE GO!"
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Yo mama is so fat that when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.
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Yo mama is so fat that she stands in two time zones.
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Yo mama is so fat that she went to the fair and the kids thought she was a bouncy castle.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps.
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Yo mama is so fat that the camera TAKES AWAY 10 lbs from her appearance.
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Yo mama is so fat that her sedan can fit 5 people... or just yo mama with the front seats removed.
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Yo mama is so fat that when she went to seaworld the whales started singing "We Are Family".
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Yo mama is so fat that she fell out of both sides of her bed.
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Yo mama is so fat that the stripes on her pajamas never end.
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Yo mama is so fat, Al Gore accuses her of global warning everytime she farts!
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Yo mama is so fat that she's got every caterer in the city on speed dial!
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Yo mama's so fat that when she goes on a scale, it shows her own phone number.
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Yo mama's so fat that she doesn't need the internet - she's worldwide.
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Yo mama's so fat that when she goes on a scale, it reads "lose some weight".
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Yo mama's so fat that she doesn't get dreams, she gets movies!
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Yo mama's so fat that when she walks, she changes the earth's rotation!
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Yo mama is so fat that she uses the entire country of Mexico as her tanning bed. |